10 Easy Steps for How Not to Pass a Maths Course
1. Don’t bother to do homework - go out and play and count on trying to learn a whole year’s work in two weeks.
2. Talk instead of working in class - your current socializing is more important than your future.
3. Do as few problems as you can - after all, practice only counts at sport or music.
4. Don’t worry if you’re failing at mid-year. You still have half a year to learn a year's work. Anyway, sportsmen don’t need brains (unless they get injured, or dropped from the team, or need to invest their earnings for when their short sporting career is over, and this would never happen to someone as talented as you.)
5. Leave all assignments to the last minute - so you have to spend less time worrying about them. You were going to do a poor job and get a poor grade anyway and this gives you an excuse to use.
6. Always lose the assignment sheet and claim you never got one - as an excuse for why you missed handing in the assignment, or try “the dog ate it” as a variation.
7. Never take your textbook to class - otherwise someone might expect you to do some work.
8. Spend the first 15 minutes of every period looking for your pens, pencils and book, then you only have 40 more minutes to try and waste.
9. Spend all your study time on the subjects you like and leave the rest - you plan to fail them anyway.
10. After using steps 1-9 all year, blame everyone else for your failure on the exam.
2. Talk instead of working in class - your current socializing is more important than your future.
3. Do as few problems as you can - after all, practice only counts at sport or music.
4. Don’t worry if you’re failing at mid-year. You still have half a year to learn a year's work. Anyway, sportsmen don’t need brains (unless they get injured, or dropped from the team, or need to invest their earnings for when their short sporting career is over, and this would never happen to someone as talented as you.)
5. Leave all assignments to the last minute - so you have to spend less time worrying about them. You were going to do a poor job and get a poor grade anyway and this gives you an excuse to use.
6. Always lose the assignment sheet and claim you never got one - as an excuse for why you missed handing in the assignment, or try “the dog ate it” as a variation.
7. Never take your textbook to class - otherwise someone might expect you to do some work.
8. Spend the first 15 minutes of every period looking for your pens, pencils and book, then you only have 40 more minutes to try and waste.
9. Spend all your study time on the subjects you like and leave the rest - you plan to fail them anyway.
10. After using steps 1-9 all year, blame everyone else for your failure on the exam.
Test for Dementia
Below are four (4) questions and a bonus question. You have to answer them instantly. You can't take your time, answer all of them immediately. OK?
Let's find out just how clever you really are.
First Question:
You are participating in a race. You overtake the second person. What position are you in?
Second Question:
If you overtake the last person, then you are...??
Third Question:
Mary's father has five daughters: 1. Nana, 2. Nene, 3. Nini, 4. Nono..
What is the name of the fifth daughter?
Fourth Question:
Very tricky math ! Note: This must be done in your head only.
Do NOT use paper and pencil or a calculator. Try it.Take 1000 and add 40 to it. Now add another 1000. Now add 30. Add another 1000. Now add 20. Now add another 1000
Now add 10. What is the total?
Bonus round:
There is a mute person who wants to buy a toothbrush. By imitating the action of brushing one's teeth he successfully expresses himself to the shopkeeper and the purchase is done.
Now if there is a blind man who wishes to buy a pair of sunglasses, how should he express himself?
Let's find out just how clever you really are.
First Question:
You are participating in a race. You overtake the second person. What position are you in?
Second Question:
If you overtake the last person, then you are...??
Third Question:
Mary's father has five daughters: 1. Nana, 2. Nene, 3. Nini, 4. Nono..
What is the name of the fifth daughter?
Fourth Question:
Very tricky math ! Note: This must be done in your head only.
Do NOT use paper and pencil or a calculator. Try it.Take 1000 and add 40 to it. Now add another 1000. Now add 30. Add another 1000. Now add 20. Now add another 1000
Now add 10. What is the total?
Bonus round:
There is a mute person who wants to buy a toothbrush. By imitating the action of brushing one's teeth he successfully expresses himself to the shopkeeper and the purchase is done.
Now if there is a blind man who wishes to buy a pair of sunglasses, how should he express himself?